2025 was the year politics truly went off the rails. And when that happens, satire turns into a basic necessity.

Because if we can’t laugh at this stuff, we’re letting it pass as normal. And also: because these moments show you how power works.

So this week, with Yanis Varoufakis, I hosted a live awards show for the Most Outrageous Political Moments of 2025. Watch the awards to get Yanis’ take and see who he picked, and who won the audience vote. Plus, at the end, our resistance wins and person of the year.

OK, here are the nominees, with a few bonus ones at the end.

Let’s go.

Shameless Quote Award

The award for politicians who didn’t just say the quiet part out loud — they said it slowly, on camera, and acted like it was normal.

1. Kaja Kallas

Kallas is the EU’s foreign policy chief. And in November she said this at a press conference:

In the last 100 years Russia has attacked more than 19 countries. None of these countries has ever attacked Russia.

Yeah, she skipped over the small detail of Hitler’s invasion of the USSR in 1941 — in an alliance with Finland, Italy, Romania and Hungary.

And since Kallas is the gift that keeps on giving, here’s another gem from her.

Kaja, thanks for the material. But also: resign.

2. Thierry Breton

Thierry Breton is the EU’s self-styled “digital enforcer”, aka censorship czar. He’s also a former EU Commissioner.

Anyway, in January he did a TV interview about alleged Russian interference in elections. “We have to prevent interferences and make our laws apply,” he said. All good so far.

But then he drifted into something else — talking as if Brussels stepping into elections is normal, saying:

We did it in Romania, and we will obviously have to do it in Germany, if necessary.

You heard it right: a senior EU figure casually talking like voiding elections is just another tool in their kit. Uh, no.

3. Benjamin Netanyahu

Speaking to the New York Times a few weeks ago, Netanyahu said:

I think Churchill would have been accused of stupendous war crimes. We don’t carpet-bomb. We don’t do Dresden. We don’t do any of that.

It wasn’t the first time he’s made this point. A total inversion of reality, delivered without blinking.

4. Donald Trump

In October, Trump addressed Israel’s parliament and praised their military campaign while boasting about US weapons supplied to Israel — including telling the room that Netanyahu repeatedly called asking for specific weapons.

That quote in full:

We make the best weapons in the world, and we’ve given a lot to Israel, frankly. Bibi would call me so many times: ‘Can you get me this weapon, that weapon, that weapon?’ Some of them I never heard of, Bibi, and I made them! … But we’d get them here… And you’ve used them well… and you obviously used them very well. What a job! What a job you’ve done…

Refreshingly honest, perhaps. Still insane.

Runners-up

We also had a few runners-up who didn’t quite make the nomination (not least because YouTube wouldn’t let us have more than four entries in the poll).

• Hard-right German leader Alice Wiedel’s “Hitler was a communist”. She then doubled down. “I don’t deviate from this either: Adolf Hitler was a leftist.” Yep. OK.
• Tech billionaire Peter Thiel: “In the 21st century, the Antichrist [is] someone like Greta [Thunberg] or Eliezer [Yudkowsky, AI critic].

Poetry. And those headlines – LOL.

Genocide Normalisation Award

Somewhere between livestreaming a genocide and trying to rebrand it as “self-defence”, Israel lost any claim to being treated as a normal state.

But its supporters and funders in the West seem intent on rehabilitating its image, fast. Peruse this selection of their white-washing, nothing-to-see-here moves.

1. Eurovision 2026

In early December, Eurovision organisers cleared Israel to participate again for 2026.

The contest stuck to its line — “we’re not political” — and the drama shifted to who boycotted, who caved, and who pretended this is just about music.

(Last year’s Eurovision winner, the Swiss artist Nemo, was having none of it. Good on you, Nemo.)

2. Germany’s arms exports

In August, Germany, Israel’s second largest arms supplier, paused weapons exports that could be used in Gaza. Reportedly because of Israel’s plans to escalate.

But since Zionism is the official ideology of the German ruling class, that pause was never going to last long. In mid-November, Germany said it would lift its suspension and return to case-by-case approvals from 24 November. Straight back to business, then.

3. Hungary and the ICC

In May, Hungary withdrew from the International Criminal Court, in protest at the ICC’s pursuit of Israeli leaders — after hosting Netanyahu and defying the ICC warrant to arrest him.

Authoritarians protect their own. That’s the whole story.

4. Trump’s Gaza plan

In late September, Trump released a plan for a ‘transitional’ or temporary authority to run Gaza after the war. It was created with the backing of Netanyahu — and zero input from any Palestianians.

So, Gaza’s next government should be designed by the same external powers that enabled and bankrolled its devastation, with war criminals like Tony Blair playing an active role.

No, I think.

Repression in the Heart of Europe Award

Here in Europe we’re all about freedom — until you fall out of line. Then our establishment will go after your bank account, ban your travel, and treat your T-shirt like a weapon.

1. Husayn Doğru

In June, the EU sanctioned the German journalist Husayn Doğru, without a court and without a trial. He’s still blocked from accessing money — he can’t buy anything, he can’t be paid for anything. And he can’t leave the country.

And because these are EU sanctions, the punishment lands first and the appeal comes later.

What did he do wrong? You guessed it: Husayn criticised Israel and reported on Germany’s repression of Palestine activism.

Here’s our livestream with Husayn, in case you missed it. (Watch his answer when I ask what he’d say to people who are scared this could happen to them.)

And while you’re at it, check out our tour of Germany’s greatest hits of repression.

2. Palestine Action

In July, the UK proscribed the pro-Palestine group Palestine Action under terrorism powers, putting its activists — including harmless grandmothers — in the same category as ISIS and Al-Qaeda.

Then it spiralled into the kind of policing stories that sound like a Benny Hill sketch: arrests and investigations over signs, slogans, and parody shirts — “PLASTICINE ACTION” — plus a court challenge that kept the ban under scrutiny into late November.

Go Britain.

3. Nicolas Guillou

In late 2025, the US — in collaboration with Europe’s leaders — sanctioned French ICC judge Nicolas Guillou for… doing his job.

Guillou played a big role in the ICC’s Gaza investigation, including the arrest warrant for Netanyahu. The sanctions went way beyond posturing: his access to money, services, and even his basic digital life got hit.

4. Francesca Albanese

In July, the US sanctioned UN Special Rapporteur Francesca Albanese over her Gaza reporting. Not a rebuttal, not a debate — sanctions.

She’s now barred from entering the US, and she says banks and insurers treat her as toxic. She can’t book hotels in her own name, can’t make payments, even her medical insurance now refuses to reimburse her.

This is what “rules-based order” looks like now.

Establishment Career Ladder Award

Our award for establishment figures who always, somehow, manage to fail upwards.

1. Greece / Eurogroup

In December, Greece’s finance minister was elected President of the Eurogroup — the finance ministers’ club that steers eurozone economic policy from deep behind closed doors.

This is the same Eurogroup ecosystem that helped enforce Greece’s austerity years. Now Greece supplies its chair — a reward for compliance, and proof that if you do what the Eurogroup wants, you get promoted. Even when your citizens are worse off than before.

2. Annalena Baerbock

In June 2025, Annalena Baerbock was elected President of the UN General Assembly. As Germany’s foreign minister during the Gaza genocide, she repeatedly stressed Germany’s “unshakable solidarity” with Israel while Germany defended its arms exports at the ICJ.

Yes folks, hers is now the public face of the United Nations general assembly.

Here’s a petition we co-organised, calling for Baerbock to resign — 100K signatures so far. Add yours!

3. Tony Blair

One of 2025’s establishment ladder climbers has to be our Tony, named in the aforementioned Trump Gaza plan as a candidate for the “Board of Peace”.

OK, Blair was later reported to be dropped after objections. But the fact that this war criminal was in the draft tells you all you need to know.

4. Kaja Kallas

In early December, even The Telegraph ran a piece arguing Kallas’s posture risks strengthening the Kremlin’s narrative — calling her “a gift to the Kremlin”.

When a hawkish right-leaning paper is saying this, you know the rhetoric has got out of hand.

War Fever Award

Establishment types love the spectre of war, and the propaganda tap is already gushing. 2026 will probably bring a fresh wave of announcements about dastardly Russian moves because THEY HATE OUR FREEDOMS, or some such. But hey, our leaders are inside Putin’s mind, so maybe we should just take them at their word and bulk up on arms.

The last year of ramped-up war rhetoric produced some quotes for the ages.

1. Mark Rutte: “Daddy”

NATO Secretary-General Mark Rutte got himself into a rut (sorry) at the NATO Summit. Responding to Trump’s comments on Iran and Israel, Rutte said:

Daddy has to sometimes use strong language to get them to stop.

Then the White House leaned into it with a viral video titled “Daddy’s Home”.

Rutte was rightly humiliated. Maybe he was just being honest. But WTF.

2. German authorities: “Find your bunker”

In June, Germany’s civil protection leadership publicly pushed the message that Europe needs to get serious about shelters again — including plans to map and expand bunker capacity. (Similar to Sweden and Finland.)

I couldn’t resist — I found an app with some of the worst copy on this I’ve ever seen. I dunno if it’s the official one, but who cares, it exists. Read this in your head with a heavy German accent:

Get the most reliable bunkers in all of Germany with BunkerFinder. Hand-picked information and a detailed checklist prepare you perfectly for every situation. Keep track of bunkers everywhere in Germany.

Does anybody take this stuff seriously? (And uh, what’s with that logo?)

3. Signal leak: “We are a GO!”

In March, senior US officials accidentally shared sensitive military planning details in a Signal chat that included a journalist. Through this chat, the journalist learned about an imminent military operation in Yemen.

Messages included:

• “Weather is FAVORABLE… we are a GO for mission launch.”
• A message about a target walking into “his girlfriend’s building” and “it’s now collapsed.”
• JD Vance replying: “Excellent.”

When killing becomes as casual as group chat, you know we’re in trouble.

4. France’s army chief: “Lose its children”

In November, France’s new army chief caused an uproar in the country with a comment about a potential war with Russia. France, he argued, must be “prepared to lose its childen.”

One wonders if his children will be volunteering first?

Bonus clips readers sent in

1. Lindsay Graham: “We’re killing all the right people…”

Psychotic US Senator Lindsay Graham, speaking to the Republican Jewish Coalition last month, had a truly classic line:

We’re killing all the right people and we’re cutting your taxes.

How do people like this keep getting elected? Wake up, Kentucky.

2. Nobel Peace Prize 2025: Maria Corina Machado

Halfdan Wiik from Bergen wrote in today with another nominee:

The only disappointment was that the Norwegian Nobel Peace Prize Committee didn’t appear in any of your nominations. Giving the Peace Prize for 2025 to the Venezuelan rightwinger and warmonger Maria Corina Machado (who thereafter dedicated the prize to Donald Trump) is an act of political stupidity that surely deserves to be highlighted.

Thank you, 2025. The mask is off. And it’s not going back on.